Relationships - Becca

I've been thinking lately about relationships. We hear a lot about relationships and how to successfully have them on our KGCR's programs because relationships are what make up life. The first 4 commandments of the 10 are about our relationship with God. The last 6 are about relationship with others (Exodus 20:1-17*). The greatest commandments, sum it all up: "The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." (Mark 12:29-31*)

Relationships are the most rewarding and impactful things in life. The adventure of getting to know someone, learning their likes and dislikes, their joys and even their pains and seeing God work in it all is a wonderful thing. There's much enjoyment in being able to share life with other people. There is reason to celebrate, as we see God writing His story in all of us, all to reflect His glory. The most cherished relationships are what the Lord uses to show us His love for us. He often shares with us that He is a Father. He also paints the picture of Christ being our Bridegroom, the Lover of our souls. It is an amazing understanding to behold!

On the other hand, they are the greatest source of pain and difficulty. Disagreements, misunderstandings, rejection, hurtful words and actions, abuse, etc. The greater turmoil , however, can often come from fear of going through any of those things again. So, in order to keep ourselves from experiencing those things more, we use any number of devices to protect ourselves. We might choose to spend mental energy on preparing for the worst possible scenario, avoid answering the phone or going to a social function, vent to others about how hurt we've been or how wrong the other person was, lie, hurt others because we've been hurt, put others down, etc. - basically practicing unforgiveness instead of choosing love and forgiveness.

Unfortunately, we too often take our fractured experiences and apply them to the Lord. We can consciously or subconsciously say things like "My father/mother/sibling/teacher/boss/pastor/friend was like this, so God the Father must be like that, too." Instead, the challenge is to learn Who the Lord is and apply that so that we can allow His character to be brought out into our lives, that others may see the more beautiful way.

I was recently at a young adult conference in Kansas City and a speaker was sharing about a precious time with his young son who had just spilt Kool-Aid on their new carpet. The son knew better and punishment was needing to be involved. So he took him into his room, and as he was preparing to spank him, his son was trembling before any point of contact. Just before the spanking, his little son cried out in desperation, "Dad have mercy!" The speaker recognized his son's repentant heart and made a deal with him. He said that he won't spank him if he could hold him as long as he wanted. It was agreed and the little guy awkwardly wiggled restlessly in his father's arms for a couple of minutes, but after that, he finally relaxed and just sank in peace, restrained by his father's embrace and rested upon his chest while tears overflowed his daddy's eyes as he felt the love of the Father over both of them in this "God-moment". Some time later, his son had asked him to hold him like that again.

Even as I write this, I still find myself asking, "Could it be true?". Is He a Father Who delights and even longs to show mercy? "Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy." - (Micah 7:18*, emphasis mine). I long to know His character in an even deeper way. In fear of making an image of Jesus to compare with a teddy bear, it's easy to slant more toward the "God of wrath". Ready to pounce on every misstep and blatant rebellion. But may we be careful to not go too far on either side. Christian music artist Bethany Dillon pointed out something in one of her journals in reference to the verse in Deut 6 "'Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one." In The "Oh!" heart of God found on her website (www.bethanydillon.com), she said "...beyond what our brains can process... even beyond what our hearts can contain... there is NO separation. No wrathful side of God vs. the merciful side of God. NO! "The Lord is ONE." Crazy thought, huh?!... if I dwell too much on it, I can sense myself getting a bit loony. :)"

I'm learning that our view of God will affect how we treat others, and how we view others we often believe that's how God is. To stop the crazy cycle, may we be cautious to not continually get a new view of God from Christian movies, books and even godly radio speakers/deejays writing a blog! ; ) As Dr. Woodrow Kroll (Back To The Bible radio host) would say, we "need to go back to the Bible" and with the leading of Holy Spirit, allow Him to reveal the truth in those words to find out Who He really is.

In 1 John, it talks about how we love because He first loved us. And though I've known this before, the phrase came into my mind that "we can forgive because He first forgave us". Along with that, I've also been learning that love really is a choice. According to 1 Corinthians 13, love keeps no record of wrongs. The revelation is starting to unfold, trickling from my brain to my heart! It is my desire that I, and you, will be able to walk in the fullness of His love and forgiveness. Receiving the revelation of His love and forgiveness, being filled with it so that it flows out to others, especially to our most harsh offenders.

This year, I pray that we will all truly become more like Him in these areas. Who is your offender(s)? Who has hurt you that has prompted you to put up defenses and what are those defenses? By seeking His healing, it is the process of choosing love. Choosing the way of Christ.

Lord, grant us all the courage to let You delve into our hearts and hurts, so that You may pour into us a revelation of Your love and healing, that we may be released to love and value You and others in a greater way, in the way You want us to...unconditionally, unrestrained, fully and extravagantly! May we end this year much more free than we began it. In Jesus' powerful, healing, amazing Name!

* New International Version